Celery Stalk

The Celery Stalk in the Cellar is a funny scary poem for kids by Saralee Kaye.

The celery stalk in the cellar
Gets bigger and bigger each day;
‘Twas grown by an aged bank-teller
And it feeds on tobacco and hay.

It grows and it grows in the night-time
Its flowers are pieces of chalk;
It’s fruit-yield is three quarts of quicklime-
Oh, Lord! It’s starting to walk!

Oh, help! It devoured the plumber!
The garbageman ran up a tree!
It’s gotten the landlady’s number
And now it’s advancing on me!!!

Oh, good, it was only a nightmare!
I wake up and heave a big sigh)
Now at bedtime, I solemnly swear
To eat no more celery pie.

But hark! I hear noise on the stairways!
My heart is beginning to balk.
AARGH! AT THE DOOR! FEEL MY HAIR RAISE!
It’s a ten-foot-high celery stalk!