The Gravedigger’s House is a funny scary story by Irish comedian Dave Allen about a night he spent in a haunted house and how he lost the tip of his finger on his left hand.
Many years ago I was rather foolish. We were in the west coast of Ireland and we were in a bar. We had a couple of drinks and somebody started to talk about the unknown and the spirit world.
The conversation came up about the gravedigger’s house and the locals started to tell us about it. This gravedigger was found in his bed, dead, with terrible marks on his neck and his eyes wide open. The doctor said the marks had nothing to do with his death but that the man had died of fright.
I scoffed, foolishly and it came about, with a few more drinks, that I accepted a dare or a bet that I would stay the night in the cottage beside the graveyard. I went there and we agreed that the door would be locked and I would stay in there until first light and I was locked in.
I don’t know really what happens, but I think a great deal of fear is in one’s mind. It was dank. It was cold. The effects of the booze began to wear off and I began to think, “What in the name of God are you doing here?”
And I felt… I dont know what it was. It was an instinct. It was something stronger than me that pulled me towards this bed where this man had died.
And I was drawn… I fought against it but… I was drawn nearer and nearer to this bed. And I was told somehow or other to sit on that bed. I didnt want to… but I did.
An unnatural drowsiness came over me and I became very sleepy… and I lay down knowing full well that I shouldn’t… and I went to sleep. A limbo sleep.
I awoke. What time, I have no idea. The candle had burned down. It was black. It was cold and I felt a presence. I was completely sober by then and utterly terrified. The hackles on the back of my neck had begun to rise. I was paralysed by a presence of fear and I felt something on my chest begin to move.
It crept slowly up my chest… and I couldnt move.
It came closer and closer to my throat.
I gathered all my willpower… as this thing came closer… and nearer…
And I grabbed it!
And it was wet and cold…
And I bit down on it!
Aaaaaagh!!!
I screamed in pain!
And that is how I lost my finger.
@happenstance did it on purpose to prove his point of it being hard to read misspelled words…it was pretty funny lol.
keep it up and he will soon bite off his butt
… (>’-‘)> <('-'<) ^(' – ')^ <('-'’-‘)> ….
Cheers everyone! :)
^
Hey Xandra… :)
N yeah, everyone spellings are not worth making a fuss about! :D
@happenstance I am so sorry. HI EVERYONE.
@Demented Xandra 819,Hi.@happenstance,hahaha sorry preety hurtful,and i am kinda relived ur spellings were on purpose
@demented xandra819 well what no hi to the rest of us hurtful
Guys, could you not argue about spelling? Hi @bet your so scared.
@everyone really its on purpose
Da fuq?
@happenstance,whats up with the spellings,is it intentionally?if not u could just ask lacole luv99 to help you with spellings
Paralyzed can be spelled both ways :) there’s the English way and American, like center and centre lol and awesome story :) dunno why his hand is wet though O.o’
@krissylovesscary um i hope your the one whos not serious fore reek iam note stukid relly woow
ummmmmm…..
@Krissylovesscary: You’re joking, right? Tell me you don’t actually think for a millisecond he was being serious…
*facepalm*
@happenstance you spelled like 8 words wrong in that sentence. Please tell me you did it on purpose. Because if you didn’t i think you have to go back to 1st grade -.-
@bet your scared not really just if somethings misspellerd it makis ite harde not to sai somting abouit it
@lacole luv99,what are we at an English lesson?
Tsk tsk tsk,sorry for bitting off your finger dude,funny story:D
when it says “I was paralysed by a prescense of fear and I felt something on my chest begin to move” paralysed is spelt paralyzed not paralysed.
This version is funnier mainly because he made it up but I read similar story about a man saw two bumps in his bed, grabbed a gun and shot at them, and they were his own toes.
so he bit off his own finger…nice job dude.
Dafuq?
He bit his finger.. Wow.