Maid

The Maid is a scary funny story about a rich man who finds out his wife is cheating on him behind his back.

There was a rich man who married a woman that was much younger than him. He suspected she was having an affair, but he could never be sure. One day, when he was away on a business trip, he called his house to check on her. The phone was answered by a female voice he didn’t recognize.

“Who are you?” asked the man.

“I’m the maid,” she replied.

“What? We don’t have a maid!”

“Oh… uh… The lady of the house just hired me this morning,” said the maid.

“Well, I’m the man of the house,” he said. “Can you put my wife on the phone?”

“I don’t think I can,” the maid replied.

“Why? Where is she?” asked the man.

“She’s upstairs in her bedroom with a man,” said the maid. “I thought he was her husband.”

When he heard this, the man flew into a rage.

“Listen, how would you like to make $50,000?” he growled.

The maid thought for a long time.

“That’s a lot of money,” she said. “What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to go to the gun safe,” said the man. “Take one of my guns, load it with bullets, then go upstairs and shoot that no-good wife of mine and the stupid guy she’s having an affair with.”

After a long pause, the maid said, “OK. I’ll do it.”

He heard the sound of the maid placing the phone down on the table. Then, he heard footsteps. A few minutes later, there were loud screams and two gunshots rang out. There was a long silence, then more footsteps and the maid picked up the phone again.

“OK. It’s done,” she said, nervously. “What should I do with their bodies?”

“Throw them in the swimming pool in the garden,” said the man.

“Swimming pool?” said the maid. “But you don’t have a swimming pool…”

There was a long silence on the other end of the phone.

Eventually, the man said, “I’m sorry, I must have dialled the wrong number…”